It was a good thing that I made a last-minute run to my PO Box on Wednesday before the snow arrived. Inside there was a red envelope from the Research Triangle Region addressed to Jules Williams and Forever stamped with Love.
It was sealed with a sticker of an apple with googly eyes, a smile and legs, but no arms. Why would an apple need arms??
That was enough to tickle my heart for days.
Of course, I waited until Sunday and then opened my Valentine. A little fox in raincoat and galoshes standing outside on a clear night full of stars, holding a balloon of the moon. A tiny heart above his head. “To the moon and back!” it said.
Golly gee willickers! Even after 21 years of love notes with a favorite friend, these words hold the same magic: Dear Jules. I love you!
It’s not the actual words that are so nourishing. It’s the truth beneath them—being seen, enjoyed and acknowledged, simply for being. And when it is mutually shared, mutually reflected, it lights everything up.
Perhaps that’s what we love so much about loving others?
So often conflated with romance, it’s easy to forget our lives are filled with true love. True because it is pure, undiluted, 100 percent. So close to feeling perfect it easily gets confused with flawless. Love because it is a distinct sensation—a combination of like, joy, happy and delight—that is universal and inexplicable.
For years, I have tried to put the sensation into words. Not in sonnets, but in lists. No surprise, I’ve studied everything I love that generates this sensation—it’s a long list—with surprisingly more places, things and experiences than people. The best synonym I’ve come up with is: favorite.
Junior Mints, pugs, art museums, the ocean, libraries, Mt. Hood, best friends, getting mail, sending mail, postcards, collecting things, organizing things, making things (or making things from organizing collections of postcards a la 100 Days Post Love, a silly blog I made in 2013 of love notes to 100 people). Just to name a few.
I love being in love! So, I fill my life with as many of my favorites as possible.
Not just for a day. I’m convinced that we could spend most of our waking hours enraptured in its glow, with the occasional break for a necessary moment of fear, hurt or boredom. We are human after all.
Some years Valentines’ Day can feel silly, excessive and/or unnecessary.
But, this year—as we near the anniversary of life turning upside down from COVID-19 etc.—thank goodness for a whole day dedicated to reminding us of how good it feels being in love…whether or not there is a sweetheart in particular.
May you fill your life with favorites this week and every day after.
Love,
Jules
I share a lesson learned about integrity every Monday. Sign up for delivery right to your inbox. Want more? There’s lots more lessons learned here on my blog, so have fun exploring and commenting about your own insights!