Receiving is one of the deepest forms of presence.
This is the real gift.
Not what is received.
But the stillness of that moment beholding that what is given is exactly what is needed.
This takes an open heart and open hands.
And a little bit of sneakiness on the part of the universe, I think.
This happened to me today. Maybe it’s happening to you right now!
It’s becoming a familiar feeling. A gentle sense of delight that feels like washing your hands in perfectly warm water.
It’s been happening to me a lot lately.
More than usual?
Well, that’s a bit of a trick question, isn’t it?
One of my big takeaways from reading To Sell is Human by Daniel Pink earlier this year was:
We are always making offers. Not because we’re in constant exchange (though we are) and not because we’re transacting (what we commonly think of as “selling”) which we might be. Exchange comes with the expectation of receipt, whereas offering is part of relating: showing up in the world and seeing others, feeling connected, thus offering something you have that they need.
Offerings are constant, they’re happening all the time. A hello, a text message asking “What’s up?,” space to change lanes in heavy traffic, the last chipful of guacamole, a door being opened, undivided attention, getting treated to ice cream, an invitation to hang out, words of wisdom, or a hand-me-down dress.
That’s what happened to me today.
When I stopped by to help out with a couple things at my friends’ house, there was a note and a dress on the counter.
“Oh wow, I was just thinking this weekend how I needed more than one casual summer dress,” I beamed to myself.
Since starting my Buy Nothing experiment in 2016 (initially a year, now going on three) I have been given many clothes.
All offered—no expectation of anything in return—though some still with expectations attached. Mostly about unburdening themselves. And usually stuff I hadn’t needed either.
Other times, like today, the offer is exactly what I need and thus delightfully received.
The offer comes from a place of presence, some sensing, some whispering to make the offer.
And then the presence to receive.
But, offering can become a compulsive habit of giving, an irresistible urge, and thus an unconscious act.
These offerings are constant, they’re happening all the time.
Giving, giving, giving. These are the ones with strings attached.
All different kinds of strings were behind my own constant giving in the past. From the sense of comfort found in leading and thus controlling to the joy of being seen for my thoughtfulness.
Leading and being thoughtful come naturally to me. That’s a gift.
If they are used to serve, not to be served.
And, they are only part of the equation.
Following and receiving attention are the balance. Those do not come as naturally to me.
My community and especially my “pit crew” have offered so much recently. Opportunities to follow their lead.
Even before my knee injury several weeks ago, I sensed the shift this year. A season of following and receiving, of opening and connecting more deeply, embracing wholeness.
Necessary learning journeys, I’m certain. Far from comfortable.
The universe constantly offers disruption that keeps us alert and so far this summer season has been especially “helpful.” Things keep changing. Each day new information shows up. Lots of new beginnings.
So yes, I believe I have been receiving more than usual lately. And it usually feels great!
Summer is a season of connection. A time to speak from the heart.
Say what you mean, mean what you say.
And a time to receive what ever it is you most need right now. The things you can name and say out loud and the things others are seeing and offering.
May your heart and hands lay wide open this week.
Love,
Jules